Burnout Crash!

Abraham Maslow famously created a hierarchy of needs, claiming that our most basic needs must be met before we can worry about less essential issues in our lives.  Going by that measurement, I must be doing pretty well then, especially considering that often times I need not one but two forms of entertainment at once.  Yes, as long as I can remember, one of my favorite pastimes is watching TV while playing video games.  If I’m on the console, my computer is streaming pirated television.  If I’m playing PC games, my console is streaming legitimate television.  Sometimes I’ll throw a second laptop up there, just in case I need to Wikipedia during the loading times.  Its a tough life for sure, one I constantly struggle with.  But somehow I survive.

Still bored.

Sure, when playing a game like Deus Ex I’ll zone into just the game so I can get into the story.  But some games don’t have a story and thus make great games to watch TV with.  That’s where Burnout Crash! comes into play.  After having a few long weeks and too much work to do, I decided I needed a way to melt my brain in a way that gasoline and a sock just couldn’t match.  So I set up Archer to play episode after episode and I downloaded this new PSN game I’d heard so much about.

Now I’m not sure if this is a review as much as it is a rambling look into the downsides of ADHD, but all that aside, Burnout Crash! is pretty fun.  Not amazing fun nor a waste of money.  I’d settle to say that it was a bit premature for Criterion Games to include an exclamation point in their title.  Its like ordering a Patty Melt! at a restaurant.  Sure its great and greasy, but its something you can only eat so many of  before your doctor gets a little stern with you about your future.

I’ve never played any other Burnout games, so who knows how it compares.  I’m not sure anyone can answer that.  Regardless, the game plays like a game of pinball.  You send your car careening into an intersection and attempt to get as many cars to wreck as possible.  You can explode your car and direct it to another part of the map, blowing up buildings and more cars.  You earn stars for obtaining certain amounts of damage and completing certain goals.  These stars unlock more vehicles and levels.

I actually really enjoy the bright and colorful graphics and the destructible environments.  The gameplay can be somewhat repetitive but is aided greatly by the addition of special vehicles that unlock more disasters, three different game modes, and progressively difficult challenges.  The main downside to the game, the horrible voice overs, are easily avoided by replacing the game audio with episodes of Archer.  This game isn’t one you will just want to play as a stand alone game, but its something to do while your doing something else, and this game is perfect when you need two things to do, and yet only have one.  Full circle, we’ve now come.


One Comment to “Burnout Crash!”

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